not doing so hot

again, another failure. binged today, even after having a 5 mile run yesterday. I am trying to become more aware of what I eat on my binges... and even before my binges to determine what trigger foods and feelings there are. First of all, I did not get enough sleep last night, so I think that was definitely a trigger. Second of all, I ate some chips this morning, and then a bratwurst for lunch, so I guess I resigned to myself that the day was already shot, so I may as well keep eating. The embarassing part is that my husband will notice the food is missing, and he will say, "who ate my icecream" like he doesn't know it was me. Who does he think it was, the cat?

So I can't do anything to reverse my binge, I just have to learn from it. So I have learned that the following things are trigger/binge foods for me:

chocolate
ice cream
chips
pizza
sausages (brats, hot dogs, et al)
ice cream
ice cream
ice cream
wine
beer


sigh... basically everything yummy. But I want to get better. I know I will get out of my attempt to recover what I put into it, so I need to really evaluate what I am doing

When I binge, I become irratible, mean, short tempered, I have headaches, stomachaches, indigestion, sort throat, and heartburn.

I cannot keep doing this. It is unhealthy and I am risking my health. I need to commit to a healthy lifestyle that does not revolve around food - where food is used solely for nourishment and not as a drug to make me feel better. Where food will give me energy to do the things I want to do, and not diminish my ability to do them.